I’m Kayla. I travel a lot with my wife. We hold hands. We ask for one bed. We look for places where that’s normal, not a problem. I care about food, walks, safe rides, and kind smiles. Simple stuff. For broader wander-lust fuel, National Geographic has a concise rundown of must-see LGBTQ-friendly destinations that pairs well with my personal notes.
You know what? Some cities just feel like a hug. Some feel cool but cold. Here’s what stood out to me, what made me grin, and what made me frown a bit, too. For a fuller rundown beyond this post, you can peek at my expanded list of gay-friendly travel destinations I’ve actually loved (and why).
Berlin, Germany — Gritty, warm, and very gay
I thought Berlin would be hard and grey. It wasn’t. It felt soft. Weird, right?
We stayed near Schöneberg, where the rainbow flags hang from windows all year. Tom’s Bar was packed but friendly. I met a couple who gave us tips on late-night currywurst. We went to Schwuz, danced past midnight, and no one blinked when we kissed. Big win.
- Loved: Pride (Christopher Street Day) turns the city into one big joy parade. The U-Bahn is fast. Food is cheap for a big city.
- Not so fun: Berghain has a tough door. I don’t chase that line. Also, Berlin winters feel like a long sigh. Pack layers.
Barcelona, Spain — Sun, snacks, and Eixample nights
Barcelona felt easy. We stayed in Eixample, also called Gaixample. Staff didn’t blink when I asked for one bed. We had tapas at odd hours and then wandered to La Federica for a mellow drink. The Axel Hotel rooftop is happy and relaxed. Pool, people, views. Sitges is a quick train ride. It’s beachy and playful.
- Loved: The late-night street buzz. The way folks talk with their hands. Safe, busy streets.
- Not so fun: Pickpockets. Keep your phone deep in your bag. Night cabs cost more than I hoped.
Mexico City, Mexico — Color, flavor, and real community
CDMX surprised me in the best way. We split our stay between La Condesa and Zona Rosa. Morning churros, then tamales, then coffee again. Rainbow flags in shop windows made me feel seen. We danced at La Purísima, laughed at Nicho Bears & Bar, and ate tacos in between.
- Loved: People were warm. We felt welcome as a couple. Food blew my mind.
- Not so fun: Traffic is wild. Plan extra time. Use Uber or Didi at night; I felt safer that way.
Beach lovers eyeing Mexico often veer toward Puerto Vallarta as a gay traveler—I wrote up that coast-side vibe if you’d rather swap tacos for tide pools.
Lisbon, Portugal — Hilly streets, kind hearts
Lisbon felt gentle. We stayed by Príncipe Real. Trumps had a big, fun crowd, and no one minded our awkward moves. We got pasteis de nata after midnight, still warm. I loved that.
- Loved: Small city feel, big city hum. The queer film fest (Queer Lisboa) is sweet if you time it right.
- Not so fun: Hills will roast your calves. Cobblestones plus heels? No thanks.
Amsterdam, Netherlands — Classic, cozy, a bit crowded
Amsterdam is easy mode for queer travel. We stayed near Reguliersdwarsstraat, where bars like Club NYX spill out folks of every style. We held hands along the canals. No one stared, which is the dream.
- Loved: Walkable. Great trains. People speak clear English.
- Not so fun: Tourists everywhere in summer. Book early or pay a lot.
Sydney, Australia — Big smiles and big bills
Sydney is shiny and full of life. Oxford Street is the spot. Stonewall and The Colombian had mixed crowds and good energy. We went for Mardi Gras once, and the parade felt like a slow, happy wave.
- Loved: Beaches. Trains. Friendly bartenders who actually chat.
- Not so fun: It’s pricey. Drinks add up fast. Sunscreen is not a suggestion.
Cape Town, South Africa — Beauty that sticks with you
Cape Town made me stare at mountains like a kid. We stayed in De Waterkant. Clifton 2nd beach had a rainbow vibe and soft sand. Beefcakes served camp and burgers. We loved it. But we stayed aware.
- Loved: Views for days. Wine country is close. People smiled back.
- Not so fun: Safety varies by area and hour. We used Ubers at night and kept jewelry simple.
If South Africa whets your appetite for the region, you might check out my heart-on-sleeve notes from Namibia and Botswana—both blew me away in very different ways.
Tokyo, Japan — Quiet nods and bright nights
Tokyo wasn’t loud about queerness, but Shinjuku Ni-chome was a pocket of pure joy. We started at AiiRO Café, then hopped to Arty Farty and Dragon Men. Lots of locals, lots of laughter. Outside Ni-chome, we kept PDA light. It’s more about respect than fear.
- Loved: Super clean. Trains that run like clockwork. Sweet bartenders who helped us order.
- Not so fun: Language can be tough. I saved bar names in my phone in Japanese. That helped.
Montreal, Canada — Easy, artsy, and very “come as you are”
Montreal felt like that friend who always has snacks. The Village along Sainte-Catherine is bright and open in summer. We grabbed poutine at 1 a.m. and watched a drag show at Cabaret Mado. Staff everywhere switched between French and English without fuss.
- Loved: Pride (Fierté) is lively. Great coffee shops to nurse a hangover.
- Not so fun: Winter is no joke. I wore two pairs of socks and still lost feeling in my toes.
Quick gut-check notes I live by
- Apps: Google Maps offline, Uber/Bolt/Didi where they work, and Translate for menus.
- Hotels: I ask, “One bed is okay?” during booking. If they stumble, I move on. Axel Hotels (Barcelona, etc.) are easy. W Hotels tend to be fine too.
- Money: Contactless cards saved me more than once. Small bars still like cash, though.
- Timing: Shoulder season means fewer crowds and lower prices. I like May or late September for Europe.
- Safety: I read local news. I trust my gut. If it feels off, I bounce.
Dating apps can be travel tools, too. We’ll sometimes fire up Tinder in a new city just to gauge the local queer pulse, get last-minute bar tips, or line up a sunset drink. Similarly, if your itinerary ever drops you in England’s under-the-radar Bedford and you’d rather scroll a curated classifieds board than swipe endlessly, the Backpage Bedford board offers fresh, user-posted personals and event listings so you can quickly feel out the town’s queer-friendly scene, set up a low-key meet-up, or decide whether it’s worth hopping off the train. If you’re curious about keeping those chats playful yet respectful, check out this no-nonsense guide to Tinder sexting — it serves up consent-first pointers, opener ideas, and etiquette rules so your flirty banter stays fun and drama-free wherever you roam.
For tropical vibes outside Mexico, my diaries from Costa Rica and breezy Aruba break down exactly how sunny, safe, and salsa-soaked those getaways felt.
A few places I skip or treat with care
This part’s real. Some countries still police love. I won’t name and shame here, but I check laws, I read traveler forums, and I look for recent stories from queer folks. I also skim OutProud for fresh legal updates and community advice before locking in any tickets. If it sounds risky, I don’t go. No trip is worth a knot in my stomach.
I went deep on what hit and what missed in my honest take on gay travel destinations I’ve loved (and a few I didn’t) if you want the nitty-gritty.
What mattered most
I judge a place by small things. Can we hold hands on the train? Does the front desk smile when we ask for one bed